Thursday, July 18, 2013

Back in London..........

Here I am back in London..... dwelling for weeks...staring at my drawing pads, remembering Paris..............
I could never be more grateful for the liberating experience that I had with the drawing group of my soul, my life will never be the same....
But here I am now, so numb and sad, and busy, and tired....overwhelmed with feelings and fear and love....

I miss you all so much it hurts........

Have not touched a pencil in weeks and I  feel sad and lonely.

To stare?
When you have it in your hand
And you know it can melt in a second
Do you stop and stare?
 Is it enough to know it’s there?
Or should you look and walk away
Letting your numb glaze stray?
Covered in light, but still you can’t see
The poison behind the possibility 
Eyes wide open and dusty skin
The most difficult fight is the one within
Daggers of feelings, chaos of color
Useless thoughts that don’t worth a dollar
You walk and you walk
But never talk
And once again you  feel  it
Its there...
Is it time to move on,  or stare in despair.....?!!??!!

1 comment:

  1. With your permission I'll answer, though I don't know if I fully understand the question (though I do understand teh yearning)

    See all this as advice, will you?

    No, don't stare, rather absorbe, breath in,

    If pain and loneliness is what you feel, breath it along with the mix, and don't resist too much.

    Your eyes are there to see, your heart is there to filter it and make sense in it.

    Part of the way to take it is one layer at a time, that's why I try to separate lines, colors, shapes, to limit the tools used.

    One of the things I found with you is that drawing can be a social interaction, a way to talk, not only to say, but as in a real talk to react, to make it up as you go along.
    And finding people with whom you have a common language takes time, not onlt the finding part, but creating a common language.

    So take it as easy as you can, and share, you learn the most by teaching and receive the most by giving, I know it sounds stupid but that is what I learnt the past year.

    And sorry I took the time to respond, I just read this post now.

    Bigbig hugs!